Lines In Wax

TWELVE YEARS OF UNWANTED OPINION

Month: July 2015

Misfits – The Devil’s Rain (2011)
punk & hardcore

Misfits – The Devil’s Rain (2011)

It turns out that sometimes you just can’t polish a turd. Back when this steaming pile of shit was first released, I, like many other Misfits fans clinging onto hollow vestiges of hope, checked out this record with fingers crossed. Hey, you gotta admit that the cover art is totally fucking epic – what fiend wouldn’t be half-tempted by the glorious image of Mr. Skullface looking all power metal? But, when a masterpiece of a sleeve hides a terrible turd of a record then the whole situation seems a million times worse for some reason; it’s like you’ve not only been totally gutted but you’ve been lied to as well. It’s like the small comfort in a rapist whispering creepily “it’ll all be over in a few minutes”, and then you find out later on that you’ve got HIV. I want to line up the legions of yes men who told Jerry Only it was a good idea to do another Misfits album (especially after Project 1950) and machine-gun them all with paintballs. Musically, Devil’s Rain is soundly put together, although it’s a little boring and Only’s bass is mixed suspiciously low. This record is like the …And Justice For All of the horrorpunk genre. But seriously, my real issue here is with the vocals – the out of tune, tired and flaccid croons of a withering legend trying to mimic peers departed; a retarded karaoke lovechild of Danzig and Graves, which fails to not only reach the prowess of either, but also to spark any sort of ignition on these already half-arsed, plodding, tedious songs. It genuinely baffles me how anyone aware of the Misfits legacy could possibly enjoy this album, and I strongly suspect that anyone who willingly paid money for this record may have some sort of mental illness. Avoid.

Ahumado Granujo – Splatter-Tekk (2002)
grindcore

Ahumado Granujo – Splatter-Tekk (2002)

Now this is a weird one… Ahumado Granujo (which translates as “smoked pimple” in Google Translate) are a band that I was turned on to after seeing their mental live performance at OEF 2013. They play dirgy, pig-snorting goregrind along the lines of RazorRape, Eardelete and fellow Czech countrymen Destructive Explosion Of Anal Garland (who might actually share members with this band, their sound is very similar). The biggest stand-out difference with Ahumado Granujo from other goregrind stuff is the fact that the tracks are interspersed with maddeningly unusual (and perhaps unnecessary) bouts of techno music. I don’t really get it; it works live but on a record the techno parts seem to serve only as breaks from the goregrind, and are fairly worthless beyond that purpose. Anyways, if you farking love goregrind then you’ll farking love this, techno or no techno. Bonus points to those who can pick out the sneaky Twin Peaks sample in the first few tracks.

Abominable Putridity – In The End Of Human Existence (2007)
death metal

Abominable Putridity – In The End Of Human Existence (2007)

Abominable Putridity are a slam death metal band from Russia (although they now have an American member) who formed many moons ago. In The End Of Human Existence is their debut album from 2007, containing 10 cuts of liquescent groovy guttural brutality. As far as this type of shit goes, In The End Of Human Existence is a fairly no-frills record, but it has a solid, meaty production that hammers the heaviness home with impressive precision and a refreshing punch. It is hard, perhaps nigh on impossible, to be truly original within the genre of slam, but don’t let that distract you from the fact that In The End Of Human Existence is a beast of a death metal record. Cool fact: later Abominable Putridity recordings feature the vocalist from Pathology (who are fucking ace). 

Killing Joke – Absolute Dissent (2010)
rock

Killing Joke – Absolute Dissent (2010)

Killing Joke have a long and varied discography but Absolute Dissent is the album I end up coming back to again and again. Everything since the 2003 self titled record has been brilliant (even the dub remix album) but Absolute Dissent takes the crown for me, every time. It possesses a clarity and melody that is equally matched with heaviness and bite. All the songs here seem to follow a certain method or blueprint, but still remain interesting, fresh and manage to stand apart. The record opens with the title track, and you can just envisage this (and the following track “The Great Cull”) being sang by thousands of adoring fans at a live concert – the choruses are huge and ballsy, which is quite funny considering the subject matter of the latter track. “Fresh Fever From The Skies” continues in a similar grim vibe but with a massive chorus. Other stand out tracks include “European Super State”, “This World Hell”, “The Raven King” (dedicated to the sadly deceased Paul Raven) and the closing “Ghosts Of Ladbroke Grove”. I have speculated with myself what this final track could be about, but I failed to reach a conclusion (for now). Go!