Lou Reed & Metallica – Lulu (2011)

Small town girlllllll! Haha! Now, I’m no stranger to weird and wonderful music, and of course one of the sad caveats that come with such worlds: music that is up its own arse, or collaborations that are just doomed to fail but float along on the artistic merit of those involved. I’m not want to shit on these worlds, but what Metallica and Lou Reed attempt to do with this “bold” and “challenging” record just takes a great big loose stool shower over pretty much all of that.

I didn’t want to join the swathes of internet critics who simply proclaim that this sounds like a crazy old man rambling over some tired Metallica B-sides, but unfortunately, despite every bone in my body trying to ascertain any real meaning or feeling, I simply cannot and do not “get” this album. Therefore, I must also conclude that yes, Lulu is the sound of a crazy old man rambling over a series of bland Metallica B-Sides. Its like a bunch of metal dads jamming out after one bifter too many.

All jokes aside, I appreciate what both parties tried to do here, but it just fucking sucks ass, so so badly.